open post;

[cicatrize]

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Comments

tflns

[cicatrize]

1. I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring

2. never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my ass is on fire.

3. No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie

4. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.

5. Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone

6. I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first

4

[freightcars]

that's not your imagination
that happened last night
you were drowning, but I'm not sure whether it was on something coming out of you or something going in you
either way, I think that's the worst mouth to mouth I've ever had to give

[cicatrize]

If you're saying any part of my face was touching a toilet or toilet water, I'd rather be concussed until I forget again, thank you.

[freightcars]

I've got a hammer

[cicatrize]

Do it. I'm ready. I can't be expected to live like this.

[freightcars]

How's the hangover?
Any lemony aftertaste or was it more like a bleached mint

[cicatrize]

It isn't so much the taste as it is the smell. There's this overwhelming cloud of something with an edgy name or "sport" labeling it that reeks of fuck boy. Exactly how much Axe did you baptize yourself in last night?

[freightcars]

If you knew how bad your mouth tasted last night you'd be impressed that I didn't just start drinking it as a palate cleanser

[cicatrize]

Why are you so intent on making this worse? My mouth has done so many wonderful things for you and you're making me want to crawl out of my skin in my time of strife and need.

[freightcars]

I kinda feel like this is my reward for saving your life
I get to be a constant living reminder that your mouth will never be clean again

[cicatrize]

Is that really what you want on my mind next time you need a pliant throat to fuck?

[freightcars]

I'm gonna think it's worth it for about three weeks, and then I'll regret shooting myself in the foot.

[cicatrize]

Three weeks? Please. I'll be amazed if you hit two.

freightcars; https://bakerstreet.dreamwidth.org/6976984.html?thread=3069805528#cmt3069805528

[cicatrize]

It did. The entire organ system is picketing and I'm about to outsource the whole process to cybernetics.

[freightcars]

I wouldn't really recommend it, it takes a good five years to get used to it

[cicatrize]

I don't plan to hire discount Nazi surgeons and do my recovery in a freezer, Bucky.